I unfollowed someone on Facebook recently. I’ve only used this nifty tool a handful of times over my 9+ years on Facebook, but each time I’ve appreciated the opportunity to keep a “friendship” while also keeping my sanity.
You may relate to the dilemma I encountered – You have a friend on Facebook that you care about and you want to keep in touch. But, over time this friend posts so often that their posts literally overtake your news feed. The most extreme case is when that friend posts things that make your gut sink and your heart hurt. Being bombarded by these things when you’d rather see cute pictures of their kids and hear great news about their lives can wear you down. The negativity, hatred, and constant complaining isn’t something I want to surround myself with. So . . . I unfollow!
This tool isn’t just for Facebook – it can be a great tool for life. Who and what we choose to surround ourselves with is key to achieving the positive life we want to live. Surround yourself with those who support you, love you, and share positivity and you, too, will exude support, love and positivity. Likewise, surround yourself with those who put you down, discourage you, or complain constantly and you’ll be likely to follow that path instead.
Even in marriage, it is so very important to surround your marriage with people who are for your marriage and not against it. This is where the “unfollow” rule can come in handy because there are some relationships we have to have and can’t simply terminate (think family members, co-workers, neighbors, etc.). BUT, we can choose to “unfollow” them – their advice, their complaining, their discouragement – and still keep the relationship.
Have you experienced a situation like that? Perhaps you have a sibling that went through a bad divorce and is down on marriage as an institution and chooses your marriage to bash whenever possible. Or what about that friend from work that is single and hounds you to go to the bar and help them pick up other singles and when you choose not to go they ridicule you. It could be that neighbor who is super gossipy and likes to come over and feed your head with things that drive a wedge between you and your spouse. Or just insert any other situation where someone’s words or actions filled up your marriage newsfeed with negativity and ugliness.
Guys we need to protect our sanity, our mental health, and our marriages and relationships. This means that we choose carefully who we hang out with, what information we consume (social media or otherwise), who we choose to confide in, and whose advice we choose to listen to when it comes to our marriage. It’s so easy to feed into the negativity in this world so unfollow those things that can separate you from your spouse. Do all you can to keep your marriage strong by surrounding it with loving and supportive people. Then, just unfollow the rest!